Chapter 294 - Why Didn’t You Buy My Figurine?

Geom Ujin raised his head and regarded Deok Chul steadily, then checked the address on the paper.

“That is my house.”

“Ah, so I’ve come to the right place.”

Smiling, Deok Chul sat down across from him. He had become the first ordinary person to have a private audience with the Heavenly Demon, but he had no idea how remarkable this moment was.

“Your son is Geom Mugeuk, correct?”

This was Deok Chul’s task now: coax and cajole the man with kind words until he confirmed that he was the boy’s parent, then obtain his signature agreeing to guarantee the debt.

“Your son borrowed some money. We’ll need you, as his father, to act as guarantor.”

Silence fell over the tavern. Jo Chunbae, the customers downstairs, and the guards concealed nearby were all witnessing this astonishing moment in history.

Then Geom Ujin laughed aloud.

Downstairs, Jo Chunbae was startled. This was the first time he had ever seen the cult leader laugh.

Even Hwi, his hidden personal bodyguard, had not seen the Heavenly Demon laugh so heartily in a very long time.

Still smiling, Geom Ujin said,

“I have no son who would make his father guarantee his debts.”

As though he had expected that response, Deok Chul stood and sidled over to sit beside him.

Watching, Jo Chunbae clenched his fists in alarm. The other customers’ hearts pounded at the thought of what would happen next.

Please, let no severed head roll down to the first floor!

Everyone knew how dangerous this moment was for Deok Chul—everyone except Deok Chul himself.

Deok Chul poured Geom Ujin a drink and offered some consolation.

“Everyone says that. But what can you do? The little bastard might be the bane of your life, but you still have to pay for him.”

It was a tremendous stroke of luck that he did not pat Geom Ujin on the shoulder.

Don’t touch him!

Jo Chunbae prayed fervently.

“Let me be frank. If your son can’t repay the loan, people will come looking for you. The debt collectors are frightening men, so you need to be careful.”

Geom Ujin seemed to be enjoying this experience, unlike anything he had encountered in his life.

“You needn’t worry about me.”

“Then please read this first. Take your time, then sign it.”

Deok Chul placed the document before Geom Ujin and rose, as though giving him a moment to read it.

“Oh?”

His gaze caught the inscriptions on the wall. This was where the Demon Supremes had left their words and signatures.

“A lot of famous people have been here.”

There was “The Poison King was here,” a trace of the Golden Great All-Encompassing Demonic Art left by the Demonic Buddha, and beside it, an inscription from the Blood Heaven Saber Demon.

Blood Heaven stopped by for a drink with his disciple.

“Oooh! The Blood Heaven Saber Demon left something too!”

He looked down at the Blood Heaven Saber Demon figurine at his waist. Having seen the man in person today and even bought his figurine, he felt a sense of familiarity, as though someone he actually knew had left those words.

Then one signature caught his eye. Its strokes were more powerful than any other writing there.

Heavenly Demon, Geom Ujin.

Deok Chul jumped in astonishment.

“Oh! Even the Demonic Cult leader has been here! Wow! Have you seen this?”

He looked around.

The people downstairs were staring at him anxiously. When had he ever received so much attention? Deok Chul felt inexplicably excited and pleased.

“The cook here must be excellent.”

After calling down loudly, he added for Geom Ujin’s ears alone,

“Then again, it’s always these shabby little places that have the best food, isn’t it?”

Then he raised his voice toward Jo Chunbae downstairs again.

“A place the Demonic Cult leader visited! You could rename this place ‘The Tavern the Heavenly Demon Visited.’ I’d change it immediately!”

Jo Chunbae shook his head, his expression pleading, Please stop!

Then Deok Chul started and turned back toward the inscribed wall.

“Huh? Come to think of it, the Demonic Cult leader’s name is Geom Ujin too.”

He looked at Geom Ujin, then at the wall again.

Jo Chunbae and everyone downstairs grew hopeful.

He’s finally realizing who he’s talking to! Hurry up and beg forgiveness!

Deok Chul seemed to study Geom Ujin for a moment, then said,

“It must be inconvenient, having the same name as the Demonic Cult leader.”

A silent wave of despair swept through the first floor.

It never occurred to Deok Chul, even for an instant, that the man before him might be the Heavenly Demon.

“Now, please sign. You’ll have to do it eventually. What parent can ever win against their child?”

“I have no such son.”

“If you don’t, those frightening men will drag your son away.”

“To do that, they would have to be more frightening than the people whose names are on that wall.”

Naturally, Deok Chul took it as a joke. All the most frightening people in the world were listed there. Anyone more frightening could only be encountered after death.

“I understand. You’re right. You raise your children, and they think they grew up all on their own. Now, take this brush. Just sign here. I suppose I’ll have to have children and go through the same thing before I realize, ‘Ah, so this is how my parents felt.’ Don’t agonize over it. Just write your name.”

Feigning reluctant surrender, Geom Ujin signed the document.

“Well done. It’s all for your son’s sake.”

Looking down at the document, Deok Chul started again.

Jo Chunbae and the customers downstairs grew hopeful once more.

Yes, compare it with the writing on the wall! Turn your head! Please!

Had their collective wish reached him? Deok Chul slowly turned and looked at the wall.

His eyes widened. It seemed he had finally recognized the Heavenly Demon.

“It’s not just your names—the handwriting is identical too! Wow, how extraordinary!”

“Good grief,” escaped Jo Chunbae’s lips. A customer nearby lost his grip and dropped his chopsticks, while the man beside him clutched his head and spilled his drink as he groaned.

“Surely you don’t look like him too?”

The very possibility of meeting the Heavenly Demon in a place like this did not exist in Deok Chul’s mind.

“You should be careful. Someone could easily mistake you for an impostor posing as the Heavenly Demon.”

Just then, someone entered the tavern.

Everyone downstairs held their breath at his arrival.

The man strode across the room and climbed to the second floor.

Glancing over casually, Deok Chul gave him a cheerful bow. He had greeted him instinctively, thinking he was someone he knew, only to recoil with a startled cry. He did know him, in a manner of speaking. The newcomer was the Fist Demon.

The Fist Demon remembered seeing Deok Chul earlier beneath the headquarters wall. His eyes therefore conveyed precisely this:

Who are you, and why do you keep turning up in front of me?

Jo Chunbae and the customers watching were gripped by tension again. The danger had now doubled.

The Fist Demon respectfully greeted Geom Ujin.

“I heard you were here, so I came to pay my respects. I’ve just returned.”

“Did your journey go well?”

“Yes, Cult Leader.”

At the words “Cult Leader,” Deok Chul blurted out before he could stop himself,

“He isn’t the cult leader! He just looks like him!”

Another groan rose from downstairs.

Geom Ujin laughed, while the Fist Demon looked incredulous.

‘Why on earth?’

Blinking at everyone’s reactions, Deok Chul’s expression gradually changed. Now that he thought about it, surely the Fist Demon would not fail to recognize his own cult leader, visit a look-alike, and address him as the cult leader?

And there was the look-alike’s response: Did your journey go well?

Why would he say that? Why else? Because he wasn’t a look-alike. He was the real thing.

By the time Deok Chul’s thoughts reached that conclusion, his face was already deathly pale. A low moan escaped him, and his entire body shook like a leaf.

The Fist Demon asked Geom Ujin,

“Who is this man?”

“He came to tell me I must guarantee my son’s debt.”

The Fist Demon stared at Deok Chul in disbelief.

“No! Absolutely not! There’s been some mistake. I was wrong! Please spare me!”

He threw himself flat on the floor. At the very moment he discovered that this really was the Heavenly Demon, he also set a new record: seeing four Demon Supremes and the Heavenly Demon himself in a single day.

Then Geom Ujin abruptly asked,

“Why didn’t you buy my figurine?”

There were no figurines of the cult leader himself, so he was asking why Deok Chul had not bought a Heavenly Demon’s Soul figurine. This was, without question, the greatest ordeal Deok Chul had faced all day. Jo Chunbae and the customers downstairs tensed again.

Then the Fist Demon joined in.

“What about mine?”

Deok Chul looked down at the Blood Heaven Saber Demon and Demonic Buddha figurines tucked into his belt. That enormous saber and golden radiance were far too conspicuous.

‘Ah! So in the end, I should have bought the Heavenly Demon’s Soul and Fist Demon figurines today!’

Was he going to die because of one moment’s choice? Goatee, I’ll remember you even after I’m dead.

Deok Chul had no idea how to answer. Finally, he spoke in a dejected voice.

“Your figurines were too frightening for me to buy.”

Choosing to answer honestly was an excellent decision. Geom Ujin laughed, and the Fist Demon laughed along with him. The reward for giving the Heavenly Demon his first hearty laugh in a long while was wholly unexpected.

Geom Ujin took a slip of paper from inside his robe and sent it flying. It drifted slowly through the air into Deok Chul’s hand.

Astonishingly, it was a banknote worth one thousand taels.

“Buy one of my figurines on your way out, and one of this fellow’s too.”

Deok Chul’s eyes went wide in astonishment. Silent amazement spread through the first floor as well.

“Would you rather not?”

“What? No! I’ll buy them! I’ll buy them right away.”

After spending the entire day stumbling from one misconception to another, Deok Chul understood the man’s intentions perfectly at this final moment.

“I’ll quit this job immediately, return to my hometown, and live an honest life! I’ll use the money you’ve bestowed on me to buy land, farm it, and take good care of my parents.”

Having given the correct answer, Deok Chul flew through the air. Not merely in spirit—his body actually flew.

With a single wave of Geom Ujin’s hand, Deok Chul floated down and landed lightly on the first floor.

Exclamations of wonder rose from the customers. All day, he had inspired nothing but despairing groans; in the end, he became the envy of them all.

Jo Chunbae smiled warmly.

“I should get your signature too. I think we ought to preserve it as the signature of the luckiest man in the world.”

“Thank you so much for accepting me as a customer. I’ll certainly come back someday!”

With tears brimming in his eyes, Deok Chul bowed respectfully toward the second floor, then left.

I once worked at the Money Exchange when I was young. On my very first assignment, you see...

He had lived through a day no one would ever believe.

Jo Chunbae also looked up toward the second floor. Deok Chul had been rude repeatedly, yet the cult leader had shown him mercy. More than that, he had opened the way to a new life for him. Jo Chunbae felt heartfelt respect for the cult leader.

Above all, hearing the Heavenly Demon laugh aloud today had made him immensely happy.

Jo Chunbae wrote the date on the wall behind the counter, then added:

The day the cult leader laughed heartily.

In a lifetime of selling wine, this was a day he would never forget. He had never known a day that felt so good.

Upstairs, the conversation continued between the two most manly men in the Divine Cult of the Heavenly Demon. The Fist Demon was the person Geom Ujin trusted most, so their conversation was easy and natural.

“You seem to be enjoying yourself.”

“When else in my life would I find myself saddled with debt?”

“When you’re with Mugeuk, you experience things you could never have imagined. Acquiring an unexpected adopted daughter, for instance.”

The Fist Demon had come to tell the Heavenly Demon this news before anyone else.

“I’ve decided to adopt Yi An, who served as Mugeuk’s bodyguard, as my daughter.”

Very little surprised Geom Ujin, but this news did.

He filled the Fist Demon’s cup to the brim.

“Congratulations.”

The Fist Demon drained the drink with relish.

Then he filled Geom Ujin’s cup in turn.

“A disciple and a daughter. I’ve been blessed late in life.”

“Daughters are better than sons. Raising sons gets you nothing...”

Geom Ujin’s gaze wandered into the distance beyond the window.

Still, today he missed that son who would make his father guarantee his debts... just a little.

* * *

Geom Mugeuk shut himself away in his room at the inn and devoted himself entirely to training in the Secret Art of Heavenly Time.

Now he did all his training within the Secret Art of Heavenly Time, without exception. Naturally, he could train for longer. The more time he gained, the more he could train, which in turn allowed him to gain still more time.

While he was training, Ju Yang of the Money Exchange, the man who had lent him money, came to visit.

“I’ve seen all sorts of lunatics in this line of work, but you’re the first to put down the Demonic Cult leader’s name as your father.”

Before leaving the Money Exchange, Deok Chul had reported the findings of his first and last investigation: the debtor was a lunatic who had used the Demonic Cult leader’s name. Naturally, the Heavenly Demon’s son could not possibly have taken out a Hell King Debt.

“You couldn’t possibly have met the Demonic Cult leader. How can you accuse me of lying about who I am?”

“You may have been counting on that, but we did meet him.”

“My father?”

“I hear he was drinking in some shabby tavern.”

This time, Geom Mugeuk laughed aloud. His laugh was exactly like Geom Ujin’s at the Merry Life Tavern.

“Why are you laughing?”

“Because I thought of my father.”

He pictured his father drinking alone at the Merry Life Tavern. Remembering the back of that man who bore every burden, he found himself missing him.

“Will you only come to your senses after you’re dragged to the Demonic Cult, skinned, and thrown into a vat of salt?”

“Do you have the courage to take me to the Demonic Cult?”

Ju Yang’s eyes turned fierce.

“You think we’re nothing but thugs peddling Hell King Debt.”

“Aren’t you?”

A cold sneer formed on Ju Yang’s lips.

‘Things have been dull lately. Now here’s an amusing bastard.’

Thoughts of how to fuck this fellow up filled Ju Yang’s head, but he kept those feelings hidden. Nothing was more entertaining than politely guiding someone into hell.

“You asked who my father was, so I told you. You asked for my address, so I wrote it down. That’s all.”

Even when Geom Mugeuk persisted to the end, Ju Yang did not lose his temper. The wording on the promissory note would punish him anyway.

“Young people can be rash. I understand. Plenty of people give false addresses. But now you owe one hundred taels.”

“One hundred? Didn’t I borrow ten?”

Ju Yang took the promissory note from inside his robe and showed it to him.

“Look here. Isn’t it written at the bottom? If the address or family information provided is false, the borrower must repay ten times the amount borrowed.”

“The writing’s too small to see. And the wording is far too complicated.”

“Surely providing accurate information on a promissory note is the bare minimum? At any rate, your loan is now one hundred taels. Naturally, the interest will also be calculated as though you borrowed one hundred.”

“Why do you keep saying I provided false information? I told you, I wrote it correctly.”

Ju Yang spoke gently.

“What will you do if I bring a real demonic martial artist here? Why do you keep this up?”

He clearly had something to rely on.

A straightforward question would not get the answer Geom Mugeuk wanted. He spoke softly, as though to himself.

“A demonic martial artist? You’re just a Hell King Debt loan shark.”