Chapter 76 - If I Decide to Live

There was no denying that I relied on the Blood Heaven Saber Demon. There were things I relied on Father for, and other things I relied on him for.

“Solve it by doing what you do best.”

“What would that be?”

“Kill the Wind Heaven Cult Leader.”

I laughed loudly, taking it for a joke, but the Blood Heaven Saber Demon was serious.

“Why are you laughing? You'd kill two birds with one stone. Kill the Wind Heaven Cult Leader, and no one will dare oppose you becoming the successor. And you'll get the subordinate you want as a bonus.”

“I'm not going to kill the Wind Heaven Cult Leader.”

“Why not?”

“He isn't a good man, but he isn't so evil that he deserves to die, either.”

“That can't be the reason. Isn't it because he's your treasure vault?”

“Well, there's that, too.”

“You're the villain here.”

“I admit it.”

“Why admit it so readily?”

“How could I catch evil men if I were hopelessly nice? I'll become a proper villain. I'll bear the karmic burden and go to hell for it.”

“Hell is for people like me. You should walk a path strewn with flowers.”

I could feel that he meant it, and I was deeply moved.

“You've already made up your mind, haven't you?”

“Yes.”

After my conversation with Chief Strategist Sima Myeong, I had resolved to make the shackled man one of my own.

“He belongs to the Wind Heaven Cult Leader, so you can't simply take him.”

“That's right.”

“Then leave it to him. Have him come to you himself.”

“But he's shackled.”

“He'll have to free himself from those shackles. Doesn't he have to demonstrate at least that much ability to be worth recruiting?”

“You're right, but I'm not sure I've given him that much confidence in me. We haven't exchanged a single word yet.”

That was why I had come to the Blood Heaven Saber Demon. Whatever anyone else might think, I had trusted him to understand how I felt.

And indeed, instead of calling me a lunatic, he offered an answer I had never considered.

“Then give him that confidence.”

“How?”

“Show him your people.”

“!”

“Your people will show him what kind of man you are. If the man you're trying to recruit is intelligent, simply seeing them will give him confidence in you. He probably won't be able to resist coming over.”

I gazed at him silently. I had never imagined he would offer advice like this. It was all the more valuable because it was steeped in his own experience.

“Why are you looking at me like that?”

“That's the best advice you could have given me.”

“Honestly, it's not quite that good, is it?”

“You're the first among my people, sir. That's why it's the best advice.”

“Then it's the worst advice, isn't it?”

This time, I laughed first, and the Blood Heaven Saber Demon joined in.

“Seeing me would send even a willing recruit running. Show him the others. I wasn't thinking of myself when I said it.”

I spoke firmly.

“You have to come, too, sir.”

“No.”

“It isn't because I want to show you to him.”

“Then why?”

“I want to show you, too. Show you whom I've chosen.”

“Why?”

“Wouldn't that help you understand what kind of man I am?”

“Again, why?”

“Because I want to give you confidence in me. Because I want us to grow closer. Now that's killing two birds with one stone.”

The corners of the Blood Heaven Saber Demon's eyes twitched. He usually wore that expression when angry, but this time it came from embarrassment.

“How can you say something so embarrassing right to my face?”

“Let's go.”

I sprang to my feet.

“Now?”

“Why put it off when you're going to come anyway? Let's bring everyone who's free. I'll show you all to each other—show you whom I've chosen, and what kind of man that makes me.”

“You really are... a lunatic.”

“Hahaha.”

Exactly. Making even one person my own was this difficult.

That applied to both the Blood Heaven Saber Demon and the shackled man.

* * *

The air in the room was cold.

The Wind Heaven Cult Leader gazed out the window, while the shackled man gazed at the Thunderous Sound Bell. Neither had spoken a word for a long time.

The winner of this contest to see who would speak first had been decided from the start. The shackled man could likely go an entire year without uttering a word.

In the end, the Wind Heaven Cult Leader spoke first.

“I'm sorry.”

The apology had cost him considerable effort. He had hoped the reply would not come easily either, but the shackled man answered as though he had been waiting.

“It's all right.”

He had agonized over that apology, only to have it accepted as though it were nothing. Anger flared in the Wind Heaven Cult Leader again.

But neither earlier nor now did he have any right to be angry. Whatever else he had done, opening that corpse-strewn space had been a terrible mistake. He knew perfectly well how much the shackled man loved the space with the blue sky and fields.

“Giving the Second Young Master those sacred relics lately must have left me with a lot of pent-up anger without my realizing it. I'm sorry.”

The Wind Heaven Cult Leader apologized again.

“It's all right.”

His expression hardened at the reply in that same unchanging tone. Unsure he could hide it, he kept looking out the window. He bit his lip until it bled.

All manner of thoughts tormented him.

'Is all this happening because I'm narrow-minded and greedy? Because I'm petty? Damn it! I can't win the heart of one subordinate, yet I talk about expanding into the Central Plains? The others must be even worse, mustn't they? They swear loyalty to my face, but perhaps they're laughing at me inside.'

If he attempted qi-circulation meditation at a time like this, he really would suffer qi deviation.

Just then, a voice came from behind him.

“Cult Leader.”

Emotion surged through him the instant he heard those words. He had been raging and reproaching himself, but deep inside, he had been terrified that he might never hear that familiar address again.

“What?”

“You keep me bound in shackles, yet you want to bind my heart as well. I told you before, didn't I? Neither of us is blessed enough to have everything without giving anything up.”

“I rule the martial world beyond the frontiers! If I'm not blessed, who is?”

“Did you win it through your own strength? Cult Leader, you merely inherited it. Granted, that's a great blessing in its own right, but I'm not talking about blessings passed down through an umbilical cord.”

“Always needling me! You're making me angry again!”

The shackled man fell silent.

An awkward silence lingered for a moment.

He was angry when the man spoke, and angry when he didn't.

The Wind Heaven Cult Leader knew exactly where his anger today had begun.

“Why did you accept the Second Young Master's wine?”

“No particular reason.”

“There's no such thing! Tell me why. I have a right to hear it.”

The shackled man did not answer. The Wind Heaven Cult Leader abruptly asked the very question he had least wanted to ask.

“Surely you don't want to go to the Second Young Master?”

The shackled man neither confirmed nor denied it.

For an instant, the Wind Heaven Cult Leader felt his legs weaken.

“You're really leaving? Really?”

“I haven't decided anything yet.”

“That's the same thing!”

His eyes narrowed to slits as he roared.

“When did you plot this together? Did you exchange sound transmissions behind my back?”

He would almost have preferred an admission that they had.

“We have never exchanged sound transmissions.”

“Then how?”

“I read his heart. The Second Young Master wants me.”

“Cut the bullshit! I said, cut the bullshit! Who do you think you are, imitating the Soul-Seizing Demon? What hearts do you two think you're reading?”

The Wind Heaven Cult Leader now understood why he had felt so offended and angry when Geom Mugeuk poured wine for the shackled man. It wasn't because the man had refused his wine but accepted the Second Young Master's.

He had sensed this coming. His fate, his instincts, his premonition had foreseen this whole fucking mess.

“You think I'll let you go? I'd kill you before I let you leave!”

“Then you'll have to kill me now.”

“What?”

“Kill me while you still can. You won't be able to later.”

The Wind Heaven Cult Leader's entire body trembled with rage.

The shackled man was the only person who understood his heart. Kill such a man? Lose him to someone else?

“You're doing this because you think I can't kill you, aren't you? Because you don't give a damn about me!”

He strode toward the shackled man and raised his hand high.

One palm strike would free him from all his torment.

Had the shackled man looked up at his face, he might have struck.

But the man sat motionless with his head bowed, sparing him any pang of conscience.

Faced with that willing acceptance of death, the Wind Heaven Cult Leader could not bring his palm down.

“If you can't kill me now, you never will. If I decide to live, no one will be able to kill me. So if you're going to kill me, you must do it now.”

The Wind Heaven Cult Leader's raised hand trembled in the air.

But in the end, he could not strike.

He slowly lowered his hand. The anger that had erupted like lava had quietly subsided before he knew it.

“You think you can escape this chaotic world alone? So easily? Never! I won't let you.”

The shackled man slowly raised his head. Their gazes met, tangled with complex emotions.

The Wind Heaven Cult Leader had not yet abandoned hope.

“You said you haven't decided to leave yet, didn't you?”

“Yes. Not yet.”

“Then I just have to keep him from taking you, don't I? I just have to become a better man than the Second Young Master, don't I?”

A smile formed on the shackled man's lips. It was natural, not forced.

“Yes. Keep living like that.”

“Stop talking as though we're saying goodbye!”

“Don't cling to me. I only seem more valuable because someone else wants me.”

“Shut up! Give me a chance to persuade you before you decide whom to serve. They say even resentment is a bond. We've spent years in the same room, so surely I can at least put up a fight. I'll do everything I can to keep you.”

“It still won't work. You're no match for him.”

The Wind Heaven Cult Leader sighed. His depleted store of sacred relics already told him that he couldn't handle the young man.

“I won't let you leave just like that. If you're going, take me with you.”

The shackled man chuckled—the first time he had laughed that day since their quarrel.

“All right. Come with me to the Second Young Master.”

“What?”

Never expecting an invitation to come along, the Wind Heaven Cult Leader stared blankly.

“Are you insane?”

But what the shackled man said next was even more astonishing.

“You said you'd resolved to make the Second Young Master the Heavenly Demon, didn't you? Come with me, and let's make him the Heavenly Demon. Then your dream will come true naturally as well. The Second Young Master, as he is now, is the kind of man who would even establish the Wind Heaven Cult's headquarters beside the Divine Cult of the Heavenly Demon.”

“You lunatic! How can you even say that?”

Just then, a subordinate spoke from outside.

“The Second Young Master has arrived with guests.”

“Guests?”

“Yes. There are five people with him.”

The Wind Heaven Cult Leader sighed and shook his head.

“Ah! He really is pushing relentlessly.”

Ordinarily, he would have snapped in irritation, but now his expression was relaxed, as though he had let go.

“You're right. We talk about the Second Young Master far too much. No wonder he always comes calling like a tiger that hears its own name.”

He addressed his subordinate.

“Show them in at once. And prepare a lavish spread of wine and food.”

“Yes, sir!”

The Wind Heaven Cult Leader looked at the shackled man with an unfamiliar light in his eyes.

“Fate must be telling us to settle the matter of you. Very well, let's decide today. Whether the Second Young Master dies or I do. Whether you go to him or stay with me. Let's settle it all today. But you must judge fairly.”

“In that respect, the Second Young Master is actually at a disadvantage. As you said, my bond with you is deeper.”

“Good. That's all I need.”

Soon afterward, Geom Mugeuk and his companions entered.

The Wind Heaven Cult Leader greeted his guests with a hearty laugh, as though nothing had happened.

“Hahaha! Welcome, all of you!”

And so began the decisive drinking gathering that would change their fates.