Chapter 204 - Damn Reincarnation

Sun Plaza

'Sister.'

As they walked together, Kristina called to Anise. In truth, there was no need. Anise was already reading her thoughts.

["No."]

Anise answered without a moment's hesitation. To her, the answer was obvious. Kristina sensed an unyielding resolve in her reply.

["I still have quite a few lingering attachments to life. There will be times when I borrow your body. But not for something like this."]

'Why not?'

["Why ask when the answer is obvious? Because attachment will turn into greed. I am accustomed to restraining myself, but what if I can no longer do so? For both our sakes, it is better not to do this."]

'We deserve to be happy. You were the one who said that, Sister.'

["... This... is not happiness. If we are not careful, it may turn into misery. Kristina. I am very fond of you. I do not know how long I will remain in this world in this form, but while I am here, I want us to live like loving sisters."]

Anise fell silent for a while. Kristina did not press her to continue. Their pace naturally slowed a little. Eugene glanced at the silent Kristina, but did not ask why she had stopped speaking.

["... If attachment turns into greed, I may find myself wanting more and more."]

'I will grant your wishes as best I can, Sister.'

["What would you do if I tried to take your body away completely? If I regretted my death and sought life by possessing your body entirely?"]

'If that is what you wish, Sister, I will gladly give you my body. You deserve happiness even more than I do.'

["... You truly are a devious person. You say that knowing I would never do such a thing."]

'It would be far more devious of me to doubt you, Sister.'

Anise chuckled at Kristina's reply.

["If you... truly do not mind, then very well, Kristina. I will gratefully accept your offer. On one condition."]

'What condition?'

["Until... the sun sets. I will use your body only until then. Let that radiant light in the sky shine upon the earth, so that I dare not harbor sinful desires."]

'Yes.'

Having obtained her answer, Kristina smiled faintly. She took a small, deep breath, then closed her eyes.

'Sister.'

["Yes?"]

'Happy birthday.'

Their consciousnesses switched places.

Anise laughed involuntarily at Kristina's parting words. Happy birthday? It had already been two hundred years since Anise died.

On this day three hundred years ago, Anise Slywood had come into the world. It was a miraculous birth. The imitation incarnation who had conceived her died, unable to endure the labor. In the end, Anise could only be brought into the world by cutting open her dead mother's belly.

Naturally, Anise did not remember that moment. She did not know what the mother who had borne her looked like. She did not even know her name. But ever since she was little, she had believed one thing to be certain.

Her mother would not have wanted to bear a child.

Likewise, Anise had not wanted to be born.

For the young Anise, her birthday had never once been a happy occasion. On her third birthday, she went to the Spring of Light and underwent the ritual for the first time. From then on, the intervals between her visits grew steadily shorter, but no matter how frequent they became, she always had to undergo the ritual at the spring on her birthday.

Anise knew very well that a birthday was a rather special day. Other children received gifts on their birthdays, but she had never received any. Nor did she bother to ask for them.

Still, at some point—when had it been?—one of the nuns who attended her had given her a small stuffed doll.

["Rather than such a shabby doll, surely the light that enters you on every birthday is a blessed gift befitting a saint."]

Had those words been meant to comfort an expressionless little girl? Anise smiled bitterly and shook her head.

The ritual at the spring on every birthday. The light that entered her body. She had never once regarded them as gifts. That stuffed doll was the first and last birthday present she received during her childhood.

After meeting Vermouth and leaving Yuras—

"Anise."

Eugene spoke. He looked intently at her faint smile and tilted his head.

"Lunch. What do you want to eat?"

His words were as casual as ever. But Anise knew the consideration beneath them. Her smile deepened as she walked past him.

"Let us go somewhere with good beer."

That golden drink brewed from fermented barley was one of Yuras's most famous specialties. Among the country's many monasteries, quite a few brewed beer, and the particularly delicious varieties were exported abroad with labels bearing their monasteries' names.

Of those, Anise had been especially fond of the beer from Kordict Monastery. She had rarely been able to drink beer in Helmuth, but after returning, she had actually taken up residence in Kordict Monastery and drunk it every day.

Because of that connection, a great many shops sold Kordict Monastery's beer during Anise's birthday festival. Anise strode past the shop assistants who had come out into the street offering mugs. There was no need to accept one and taste it. The aroma of the beer she had drunk every day for decades had seeped into her very soul.

"The quality is poor. It seems they have watered it down a little, too. Some shops are even passing off entirely different beer as Kordict's. I would like to smash their heads in, but there is no need to bother. They will all fall into hell when they die."

After careful selection, she chose a pub with an old sign deep inside an alley. Its interior, however, was not similarly shabby. Anise liked the orange glow of the large fireplace and the bustle peculiar to pubs. As soon as she sat down, she ordered two beers and their meal.

"I can say this now, but I never imagined a day would come when I would drink alone with you in a place like this."

"I think we've been to plenty of pubs noisier than this one."

"Hamel. You heard me perfectly well, so why pretend you did not? I said alone together."

Eugene smiled wryly and picked up his mug. It was true. This was the first time he had come to a tavern to drink with Anise alone.

"... Well, to be honest, rather than coming here with just you... I would prefer to come as a group, like we used to."

Vermouth, Senya, and Moron.

Eugene and Anise thought of the three who were not here.

"... We'll be able to come with Senya someday."

Their mugs clinked.

"Maybe with Moron, too. No matter how I look at it, I can't imagine that bastard's dead yet."

"Do not be so certain. If Moron really has died, you will be terribly disappointed."

"Not really. If he's dead, he's dead. I know three hundred years is a long time."

"... As for Lord Vermouth... even I do not know. What is the point of talking about this?"

Smiling, Anise brought her mug to her lips. It was almost as large as her face, but she downed all the beer in it in one go.

"Ahhh!"

Shivering with delight, she set down the empty mug.

"What matters right now is that you and I are here, drinking together."

They talked about a few things while waiting for the food. While Eugene had been studying the White Flame Formula at his lodgings, Anise—no, Kristina—had visited the inquisitorial bureau and the Faculty of Divine Magic Research. Beshara, now the sole remaining cardinal, and the Pope had not obstructed her, and Raphael, commander of the Blood Cross Knights, had personally drawn his sword and accompanied her.

"Both were much the same sort of organization. In fact, they had progressed since I was alive. The Faculty of Divine Magic was attempting to control light and miracles to create new sanctuaries and sacred objects."

Anise deliberately avoided mentioning their methods. The food had yet to arrive, but speaking of them would surely ruin their appetites.

"As for the inquisitorial bureau... I suspect they took inspiration from the saints quite some time ago. They seem to have been making attempts for a long time, and Sergio Rogeris, who once belonged to the bureau, apparently supported them consistently as well."

"What do you mean?"

"Simply put, the inquisitorial bureau was creating divine weapons. Rather than focusing solely on miracles and light, as with saints, they were making living weapons specialized for combat. Well, to my eyes, it looked like nothing more than a nest of utterly crude chimeras..."

A nest of chimeras.

Eugene knew the phrase itself was a contradiction. Chimeras neither built nests nor laid eggs or bore young. They were merely abominations made by combining monsters with other monsters, or even with humans.

"Crazy bastards."

"They really were. As a result, the Crusader cut off quite a few heads. I can say this now, but I am very fond of that holy knight."

"Didn't he seem a little too crazy?"

"Hamel. Are you in any position to call someone crazy?"

"What's wrong with me? Since we're finally saying these things, I was the sanest of the lot of us."

"Crazy bastard."

Anise laughed, swirling what might have been her umpteenth mug of beer.

"At any rate, after thoroughly killing, destroying, and burning everything, I feel much better. We also performed rites for the holy relics that had not vanished and returned them to the Light..."

She lifted her white robe a little. Showing him the flail hanging at her waist, Anise beamed.

"I also had my mace modified so Kristina could use it more easily. To be honest, I think her skills are still rather immature... Hehe. But really, my standards are probably too high."

"Of course they are. Three hundred years ago, we were the best."

Eugene smiled as well. At his words, Anise banged her mug against the table and burst into laughter.

"Aha, ahahaha! Ahaha! Yes, yes, we were. We... ahaha! We were the best. Though I wonder whether you fell a little short, Hamel."

"Are you serious?"

"Oh dear, have I wounded your pride? Do not take it so seriously. I mean when we first met you."

The food arrived. Anise chuckled as she speared a sausage with a large fork.

"I can say with certainty that we were the best. But Hamel, you were not the best when you met us. I still remember it vividly. Neither I nor Senya nor Moron could understand why Lord Vermouth wanted to take you as a companion."

"You think I understood?"

Grumbling, Eugene cut his meat.

He knew that story well. At the harbor three hundred years ago, Vermouth had tried to make Hamel his companion on his own authority, without seeking the others' understanding or agreement. Ultimately, through Hamel's duel with Vermouth, the others had acknowledged his potential and accepted him. But when they first met, Hamel had been wholly unsuited to becoming a companion of the Hero.

"... In the end, though, Lord Vermouth was right."

It had been a long time since she last drank.

More importantly, Kristina's body had scarcely ever indulged in alcohol, so the intoxication set in quickly. Anise liked its languid warmth. Had she wished, she could have shaken it off as easily as brushing away dust, but she chose not to. Tilting her flushed face slightly, she looked at Eugene.

"We were... perfect. We were perfect because there were five of us. That is why the loss of one was so devastating."

"Are you going to scold me for dying first, too?"

"Did Senya scold you?"

"She's softer than she lets on. She couldn't even scold me. She tried saying something along those lines, then ended up bawling and begging me to forgive her."

"Aha... I see what you mean. Unable to let go of her spite, Senya said something like this, did she not? You went and died all on your own. Something to that effect."

"Pretty much."

"It seems Senya has not changed. Saying something she cannot bear herself, then bursting into tears on her own. Ah... Hamel, you remember the dream I showed you, do you not? How was it?"

"How was what?"

"Were you not sad? Did your heart ache? Did you miss us?"

Anise asked with a mischievous smile. It looked as sly as the 'snake' Eugene and Senya had whispered about in their previous lives.

"... How could I not?"

"It feels a little unfair. Back then, I cried, and so did Senya and Moron. Even Lord Vermouth shed tears. But I have never seen you cry."

"... You're better off not seeing it. I'm fucking ugly when I cry."

"Ahahaha! Do you think it is even possible to look ugly with your current face?"

"Why wouldn't it be?"

Grumbling, Eugene reached for his mug. Just then, Anise sprang to her feet. She leaned forward as though falling and cupped his cheeks in both hands. Her face suddenly drew close.

"... Hehe."

Their lips did not touch. Anise gazed at Eugene from a short distance away, a smile on her flushed face.

"I restrained myself," she whispered.

Both her hands squashed his cheeks. With his face looking like a goldfish's, Eugene could do nothing but open and close his lips. Laughing merrily at the sight, Anise released him.

"If I went ahead and did as I pleased again, Senya might truly go berserk. It would be fine if I were still here then, but if I had already ascended to heaven... would poor Kristina not be left to suffer at Senya's hands?"

"... Good grief."

"Hamel the Stupid. What about you? I have made my feelings clear enough for even someone as stupid as you to understand, and although not quite as boldly as I have, Senya must have conveyed hers as well."

"... Not like you did. Actually, she didn't tell me directly at all. Senya was exactly the same as three hundred years ago."

Eugene sighed heavily and pulled his mug toward him.

"Honestly, I'm confused... and, uh... surprised. I never thought of you two that way—"

"Are you impotent?"

"Gah!"

Eugene spat out the beer that had just gone down his throat. Anise swiftly leaned back to avoid the spray.

"H-hey! What the hell are you saying...! Isn't it obvious? When did I have time for that sort of thing three hundred years ago...?"

"Do you think the rest of us thought that way because we had time to spare? Senya and I were thinking of what would come after the war. Unfortunately, the war ended in that wretched fashion, and you died."

Anise gave a small laugh and drank her beer.

"Well... back then, I had no intention of ever telling you how I felt. I was disillusioned with many things, and I knew that someone like me could not pursue such happiness. But now that I have died as I did, I simply think that perhaps I am allowed to pursue it."

"... Ahem."

"I know very well. You never had those feelings for me. Hamel. What you felt for me was affection for a companion... and pity. Was it not?"

"Yeah."

Eugene did not evade the question.

"... I felt sorry for you. You soaked your back in blood without ever screaming in pain, drank every day to endure it, and fought tooth and nail to keep bastards who wanted to die alive, even though you never took care of yourself. I felt sorry for you."

"I liked your pity."

Resting her chin on her hand, Anise gazed at Eugene.

"I liked the way you treated me like a delicate piece of glasswork. Hamel. Ordinarily, you were terribly rough and violent, but when I... bled from my stigmata and bared my back to you, those fearsome, callused hands that slaughtered countless demons... felt so soft and gentle."

"... What else was I supposed to do, dig into your wounds?"

"So bashful. I liked that side of you, too. Whatever you think of me, it does not matter very much. Fortunately, the Light's protection has allowed me to remain in this world, and Kristina's consideration has let me satisfy a small part of my lingering wishes."

"... It's just... I still don't really get it. You like me? And Senya... likes me?"

"Had you not guessed a little, in Senya's case?"

"... Well... a little..."

"And it seems you were not entirely without feelings for Senya, either. You probably had more feelings for her than for me, did you not?"

"... Can't we just drink...?"

"I will not press you for an answer."

A server brought them fresh beers. When Anise raised her mug first, Eugene raised his in response.

"I will do my best to make you fall in love with 'us.'"

Anise spoke with Kristina in mind, knowing she would be listening from the other side of their consciousness. Their mugs clinked. While Anise gulped down her beer, Eugene tilted his head without drinking.

"... Us? Do you mean Senya?"

"You dumb fuck."

Anise said it with utter sincerity. Why did he deserve to be cursed at...? Smacking his lips, Eugene slipped a hand inside his cloak.

"... Happy birthday."

The words sounded strange even to him, but as he said them, he placed a wrapped box on the table. Anise's eyes, which had been glaring at him, widened. Unable to believe it, she looked back and forth between his face and the gift box.

"... What... what on earth is this...?"

"It's your birthday today."

"Hamel...! You prepared a gift for me?"

"It's nothing special..."

"Wait, do not tell me. Let me see it with my own eyes."

Anise hurriedly tore away the wrapping. Perhaps there was a letter inside as well? The thought briefly crossed her mind, and Kristina, on the other side of their consciousness, also peered into the gift box through Anise's eyes, full of anticipation.

"... Tsk."

There was no letter. Anise clicked her tongue at her premature hopes being dashed.

"Even if you don't like it, isn't clicking your tongue a bit much...?"

"Hamel! That is not why I did it. I merely hoped there might be a letter as well..."

Anise's expression changed. Pressing a hand to her fluttering heart, she smiled sincerely. Inside the gift box lay a beautifully crafted necklace. It was only a chain, without any ornament, but that made it easy for Anise to understand what it was for.

"Your rosary."

The rosary currently hung around Anise's neck. It was the one she had used in her previous life, retrieved from the Holy See's highest-grade relic vault. The crafted cross still shone beautifully, but its leather cord was old and frayed.

"The cord looked pretty bad."

"... Hehe."

Smiling, Anise removed the rosary. She replaced its cord with the chain she had received, then lifted her hair back to put the rosary on again. Seeing this, Eugene stood without giving it much thought and fastened the rosary around her neck.

Looking at Eugene's face leaning toward her, Anise felt an impulse rise within her. What if she leaned just a little closer? People often said the first time was the hardest, and the second was easy. Had she not already overcome the first?

["Sister...!"]

Kristina cried out inside her head. If Anise insisted on doing it, there was nothing she could do, but watching like this was unbearably embarrassing...

'I will restrain myself.'

She wanted to go ahead and do it. But she held back, for Senya and Kristina's sake.

"... What are you looking at?"

"I am looking at you."

The answer came with a bright smile. Eugene chuckled and sat down again.

"We've finished eating. Is there anywhere else you want to go?"

"I am not finished yet. I intend to drink more."

Anise answered while stroking the necklace against her neck.

Three hundred years ago, even after leaving Yuras, they had never gone out of their way to celebrate birthdays. Vermouth, Moron, Senya, and Hamel would wish someone a happy birthday, but they had never given presents.

None of them were that sort of person. Yet even without exchanging gifts... the mere fact that it was a birthday made the day rather enjoyable. Even in those dreadful demon lands, when someone's birthday arrived, they would make camp early and open a jar of liquor they had been saving.

Anise had felt that every day spent traveling with her companions was a gift.

"... A little longer."

This moment, too.

Anise smiled, savoring her pleasant languor.

The clamor of the pub.

The crackle of logs burning in the fireplace.

The clink of beer mugs.

Hamel, sitting before her.

All of it made Anise feel alive.

"Until the sun sets, I want to stay here alone with you."

Anise smiled as she raised her mug.