Chapter 31

"Alien Shopping Mall? What a distinctive choice of name! Is that an on-line store as well?"

Oh, I had summoned Braun too. He was touched that I had drawn the curtains to keep the room dark for him even during the day, and overjoyed that I had finally sold off those mascot snacks.

'It really doesn't take much to move this guy...'

Actually, the mascot had given me two bags of snacks, and I had kept one unsold just in case.

Anyway, to answer his question...

"Right. You access it through the internet. You browse the merchandise on a screen that looks like a flyer."

"Aha! Is that so?"

Braun's cheerful voice rang out.

"How exciting. I wonder what sort of establishment my friend frequents—"

<Space Shopping Mall>

※Amazing Goods from Outer Space※~!!

>>I view the goods

"..."

"...?!"

"What on earth is this? This hideous flyer utterly devoid of aesthetic merit?"

Hmm...

"Isn't usefulness more important than appearances?"

"Good heavens! Mr. Roe Deer, appearance is every bit as important as what lies within! Visual effects are the first thing that moves a viewer's heart!"

"A flyer that's neither intriguing nor shocking, merely ugly!"

Yes, yes.

With his remarks providing background noise, I clicked into the site.

"... Very well, Mr. Roe Deer. I still have faith in my friend. You said it was all right, so surely, once we look past the flyer and examine the interior, it will be perfectly..."

Goods

Blood Bathtub - ₩29,999,999

Mysterious Candle Kit - ₩19,999,999

Snow White's Apples - ₩11,999,999

We Help! - ₩66,666,666

※Sale! ※ Blood-Drinking Tableware - ₩7,999,999

₩14,999,999

"..."

"Braun?"

No response. I think he fainted.

Apparently my Good Friend was a person... no, a monster who understood a designer's pain.

"Are you okay?"

"I need a moment to rest."

By all means.

I examined the merchandise.

First, the listings that hadn't changed immediately caught my eye. After We Help!, which I still couldn't afford, came an item that was actually on sale...

'It's still here.'

※Sale! ※ Blood-Drinking Tableware - ₩7,999,999

₩14,999,999

I'd thought I'd never see it again, whether someone else bought it or the algorithm removed it from my recommendations. Yet here we were.

'Did it calculate that I'd buy it?'

A little uncanny. Anyway, moving on.

The most expensive item I could afford was...

Blood Bathtub - ₩29,999,999

'This... I saw someone looking for pieces of it on Salmon Market earlier.'

It was a fairly famous item. Even I remembered what it did.

* * *

Records of Dark Exploration / Delusion Home Shopping

/ Items

Blood Bathtub

Today, I stand before you to introduce an astounding product! An incredible elixir of rejuvenation, proudly presented by our home shopping channel!

The Bathtub of Youth...

-Product description on "Delusion Home Shopping," July 7, 20XX

* * *

Pour someone else's blood into the bathtub, and it transforms into a wonderfully fragrant bath additive. Bathing in it heals wounds, relieves fatigue, treats arthritis, improves your skin, and so on.

'A modern take on a classic vampire horror story, I guess.'

And considering this famous item's standing, the price was strangely reasonable.

But whether it turned into a bath additive or not, just imagining pouring someone else's blood into a bathtub and bathing in it made my head spin...

'M-moving on for now.'

Mysterious Candle Kit - ₩19,999,999

This was an item I didn't know.

Still, candles brought lighting a flame to mind. Light was always a symbol of comfort and aid in ghost stories.

'But I'll have to think a little harder about whether it's worth burning twenty million won on.'

And finally...

Snow White's Apples - ₩11,999,999

Wow. Even if I couldn't use these, wouldn't selling them for forty million won be one hell of a profit?

'Well, I don't know if they'd count those as food derived from a ghost story... but I can at least ask.'

The listing seeking "food derived from supernatural phenomena" was still up on the site. Since it was for research, there was a good chance they were buying on an ongoing basis.

So, taking all of that into account, my choice was...

"These, of course."

Mysterious Candle Kit - ₩19,999,999

Snow White's Apples - ₩11,999,999

※Sale! ※ Blood-Drinking Tableware - ₩7,999,999

= ₩39,999,997

As I'd said earlier, light was the natural enemy of ghost stories.

And this item made candles?

I had a feeling the candles this kit produced would have something to do with defense or protection.

'It's a little pricey, but worth the investment.'

My reasoning for Snow White's Apples was along similar lines.

'Snow White's apples sound like they'd have something to do with sleep.'

I was seriously desperate for sleep these days.

If those apples helped me sleep soundly, I genuinely needed them. Seriously. My productivity would shoot straight up, and my survival rate would skyrocket...

'Please!'

That desperate hope was what made me hit the purchase button.

'Of course, if not, I can always resell them...'

I had the worst-case scenario covered too.

And last of all.

Blood-Drinking Tableware.

'With a discount this big, wouldn't buying it be the polite thing to do?'

I'd gotten plenty of use out of the Silver Snake I'd previously bought on sale, from custom equipment to summoning Braun.

Incidentally, if I pressed the plush keychain's belly gently, I could feel a round metal shape inside, as though the Silver Snake was still in there.

Honestly, I still didn't know whether I could get that much mileage out of the Blood-Drinking Tableware...

'But I think I could sell it to employees, or use it for a trade.'

Now I had Salmon Market as an excuse if anyone asked where I'd gotten it.

So those were my three items.

"Good."

They fit my available budget perfectly too.

All right, let's buy—

"Mr. Roe Deer."

Hmm?

Braun called to me out of the blue.

"About that item called the Blood Bathtub."

What about it?

"I'd like to have it."

"...!?"

W-what?

"My friend, would you be willing to give your Braun a gift?"

A sly note of pleading crept into his voice.

"Haven't I, as your Good Friend, sincerely endeavored to assist you in every way, both materially and emotionally? And yet I asked for nothing! Surely, then, a small token of compensation would... Ah."

Silence.

"I apologize. That was terribly mercenary of me... I tried to put a price in gold on friendship."

"A Good Friend does not behave this way..."

"..."

The plush doll's shadow hung its head as though ashamed and spoke dismally.

"Please edit out my remarks and disregard th—"

Hmm.

"Let's buy it."

"Pardon...?!"

"The Blood Bathtub. Let's buy it."

"!!"

Honestly, hadn't he helped me escape the theme park?

He'd saved my life. I could do this much for him.

Money here felt like game currency to me anyway, and I could see quite a few potential sources of extra income going forward.

Besides, anyone could see that staying on the best possible terms with Good Friend was the wise choice. Especially when I recalled the bizarre powers this plush keychain had used at the theme park.

'And if I'm going to buy it anyway, I should go all in instead of acting reluctant...!'

"The money I'm short will be deposited soon, too. I can buy it for you as soon as it comes in."

"Good heavens."

"Thank you! Thank you so much, Mr. Roe Deer, my friend...!"

"Sure. But this isn't payment or anything. It's just a gift because you're my friend, Braun."

"Yes, I know. My friend!"

"I'll buy the Blood Bathtub as soon as my extra pay comes in. It should only be a few days."

"Yes!!"

He must have been truly moved, because his voice trembled with joy and excitement before he composed himself again.

"I'm so looking forward to it, truly... Haha!"

Heh. Nice to see him so happy.

... Just please don't ask me to find you fresh blood anywhere.

"Oh! The goods have arrived. Quite speedy."

Anyway, the items I ordered arrived instantly in a post office box again, and I enjoyed a little unboxing session.

On top lay the Blood-Drinking Tableware I'd bought at a bargain.

"Oho. Rather distinguished cutlery, isn't it? It looks suited to a formal occasion!"

The exquisitely crafted little dessert fork and knife came wrapped in leather. Their silver surfaces caught the flashlight's beam, gleaming with delicate elegance.

But using them meant covering them in blood... Sigh.

'Still, let's carry them around for now.'

They weren't bulky, so they'd be easy to pack. Now that I had Exclusive Equipment and a decent collection of items, they might be worth trying in an emergency.

And directly beneath the cutlery lay...

[Quick and Easy Candle-Making Kit]

The box for the Mysterious Candle Kit.

Colorful and cute, it looked like something for children.

'Even better.'

If it was for children, it would be easy to make!

I wanted to open it right away and check the instructions and contents, but first, a warning sticker covering the entire front caught my eye.

[No refunds after opening. The raw materials will deteriorate 12 hours after exposure to air. Please use promptly.]

[Recommended number of users: 3]

Hmm. For that reason, I'd leave it for now.

'I should get everything ready and open it the night before entering a ghost story.'

Still, I was eager to see what effects the candles would have. For twenty million won, they couldn't be ordinary.

"That leaves only the final item!"

"Right."

At last, I examined what lay at the very bottom of the box.

It was a small, heavy... produce box of apples.

"...?"

No, seriously.

Mount Baekseol Apples

Truly Delicious! Beauty and Nutrition!

"..."

I hadn't accidentally ordered from an actual orchard, had I?

Hmm. A letter from the producer was attached to the top of the box.

Let's read it...

* * *

We extend our gratitude to all customers who have purchased Baekseol Apples.

We put our hearts and sweat into personally growing and harvesting this produce in ■■, using ■■ as fertilizer. Our apples offer distinctly different effects and flavor from those of other orchards. ^^

Directions: Thoroughly chew and swallow one whole apple.

Effects: Immediately upon consumption, you will fall into a deathlike sleep, and all vital functions will cease.

This effect lasts until sunrise the following day. Upon awakening, you will experience a surge of vitality and energy, restoring you to good condition!

※This orchard accepts no responsibility for any changes to your body during death-type sleep.

* * *

"..."

'Definitely a ghost-story item.'

So... was this like that potion in Romeo and Juliet, the one that made you look dead?

'All right. Got it.'

I opened the apple box. Inside were seven miniature apples, as round and glossy as a picture.

They were small but perfectly shaped, and bright red.

"Indeed, they look excellent for your health!"

Was he serious?

Still, they certainly looked useful.

An item that induced suspended animation, then restored your body when you woke up a day later? I'd find a use for it somewhere.

And so, my current inventory was as follows.

-Good Friend

-Blood-Drinking Tableware

-Mysterious Candle Kit

-Snow White's Apples

-Memorial Griptok

-Smile Sticker :)

-Alice Picnic Set

Plus my Exclusive Equipment and the Blue Soda Churros, I suppose.

'In a few days, I'll be adding the Blood Bathtub...'

Let's put all of them to good use and stay alive.

"Sweet dreams, then, Mr. Roe Deer!"

I went to bed a little early that night and slept reasonably well, despite the occasional nightmare.

Probably because the assumption—close to certainty—that at least the next few days would be peaceful had put my mind at ease.

'Let's regroup and recover, mind and body, until the money comes in.'

* * *

But a few days later, I faced a shocking reality.

'My extra pay isn't coming in...!'

No, even the manual revision Team A's leader had mentioned hadn't happened. That was what I was supposed to get the reward for.

'W-what?'

Had it all been a bluff? Had I been screwed out of fifty million won?

I immediately looked into the situation.

And received some shocking news.

"... The person in charge is missing?"

"Yeah. Hasn't come to work for days."

An employee on the Administrative Support Team responsible for reviewing manual revisions had gone missing.

For a whole week, no less.

"..."

Wait a second.

"Then the manual review..."

"Postponed indefinitely for now, I guess. It's not urgent or anything... It'll take this company at least two months to assign someone else to that paperwork."

N-no!

I'd made a promise to a monster from a ghost story!