Chapter 135 - The Doomsayer VII

9

Over the years, I had stood guard over countless comrades’ deaths. I had safeguarded their deaths, and I had witnessed them.

Perhaps that, too, was one reason I had been given the name Undertaker.

And yet, looking back now, the deaths of the Sword Star—Emit Schopenhauer—had always passed surprisingly quickly, and far too easily.

["Old man! That tentacle!"]

["Huh?"]

As a damage dealer, Old Man Scho fought on the front lines. Inevitably, he fell in battle before I did, playing support.

If someone commissioned me to paint a picture entitled <The Death of Old Man Scho>, I would put one of two scenes on the canvas.

The scene where Tenlegs’ tentacles cooked him into KFC chicken, sorted into forelegs, hind legs, torso, and breast meat. Or the sight of him collapsed in the café in the former Baekje Hospital building, a dullahan missing nothing but his damn head.

Either way, death began far too swiftly and ended in a rush.

His final moments had never afforded him enough leisure to murmur his last words to me.

The same held true on the occasions when we ended a run by mutual agreement. Death then was merely a “Continue” button, not “Quit Game,” so there was no particular reason to leave last words.

And so.

This was the first time, in the truest sense, that I had witnessed my friend’s end.

"... A... de, le..."

SPLASH. SPLASH.

Emit Schopenhauer crawled. Toward Go Yori. Coal-black blood spilled between his shattered fingernails.

"..."

At the sight of my old comrade brought so low, my sword hilt wavered, no longer knowing where to go.

Should I strike his neck immediately, allowing him to preserve his last shred of dignity? Or should I allow Old Man Scho to close his eyes looking at Adele’s face, even if only in an illusion?

CLICK. CLACK.

Doha teetered somewhere between being drawn and sheathed.

At either end of that tiny span hung dignity in reality and happiness in a dream.

"Shh."

Go Yori’s whisper was a little quicker than my sword.

"Leave this to me, Guild Leader."

"..."

She had closed one eye and gently pressed her index finger to her lips. A soft smile lingered on her mouth.

There had been a time when I truly loved that smile. Now I could no longer trust Go Yori.

Even so, this time I took my hand off my sword.

Was it because I had spent a week with her and been unknowingly brainwashed again?

Or had I simply sensed, as an undertaker, that the person who could give Old Man Scho a proper funeral now was not me, but Go Yori?

Under my silent gaze, Old Man Scho crawled unsteadily onward.

"A, dele... Adel... e..."

At last, his mangled fingernails touched Go Yori’s foot.

His black blood gushed onto her shoe like ink. Thick, sticky blood ran down her loafer.

"Yes."

Go Yori bent down. With both white-gloved hands, she clasped his worn, battered hand, smeared all over with coal-black blood.

"Emit."

"..."

Old Man Scho looked up with an expressionless face. Go Yori was smiling faintly.

"You’ve had a hard time, Emit."

"..."

"My goodness. You look so exhausted. Where have you been running around like this?"

"..., ..."

"Yes. Sometimes you get fixated on the strangest things and refuse to listen to anyone else. I’m always worried about you."

"..."

"Are you all right? You mustn’t overdo it. You always have to think of your health."

Only breaths of “Uh...” and “Hh...” echoed from Old Man Scho’s mouth.

Thinking about it, there were few beings with a fate as pitiful as that regressor’s.

His wife was an academic. She had been invited to a conference at a university in Korea. Old Man Scho had accompanied her on a trip to an unfamiliar land far from home.

He had never had much interest in this place to begin with. In his mind, the Korean Peninsula was merely a gray area he had never ordinarily given any thought to.

A place that had color only as somewhere to enjoy a casual trip abroad with his wife.

Now that he had lost that wife, what meaning could this land possibly hold for Emit Schopenhauer?

I find it difficult to imagine the grief of those who lose beloved family members far from home.

The only road left to Emit Schopenhauer was the road he took in search of his beloved wife.

And that reunion came in only two forms. A brief phone call lasting a few dozen seconds. An illusion in a dream within this void of the unconscious.

"... ..."

"Yes, darling."

Go Yori bent her knees. Then she gently embraced Old Man Scho.

"I love you, too."

"..."

With an exhalation of “Ah,” Old Man Scho’s body crumbled.

His flesh flowed into black ooze, and the ooze soon became coal ash, drifting away. For a very long time. There must have been so very much in his body that could turn to dust.

The jet-black ash scattered over the distant ruins of the city.

Until then, Go Yori remained on her knees, embracing the ash.

That must have been how Go Yori gave humans their funerals.

My lips stirred.

"... That old bastard."

"Yes?"

"Was he smiling at the end?"

With a little “Up we go,” Go Yori stood. She lightly brushed the ash off her body.

Dust flew in all directions, accompanied by coughing and an “Achoo.” She smiled sheepishly.

"Who knows? Perhaps he was having a happy dream. Which would you prefer, Guild Leader?"

"Which what?"

"Would you want him to have smiled in my arms? Or would you want him to have come to his senses at the very last moment, realizing that this was only false comfort after all?"

"..."

I could only remain silent.

Go Yori studied me like that for a while.

Her smiling eyes, curved into long crescents, seemed to be observing my heartbeat rather than my face.

I hoped she had not heard my heart pounding. Rationally speaking, that was a perfectly reasonable hope.

RRRRUMBLE...

Just then, the city’s ruins erupted with a roar, swallowing every sound and vibration around us.

Go Yori looked up at the sky.

"Ah. This place’s Bad Ending is over, too."

She clasped her hands behind her back.

"Really, I can finally breathe a little easier now. Thank you, Guild Leader. You’ve made things a little easier for me."

"... What do you mean?"

"Ahaha. There have been too many powerful nightmares here lately. Even Cheon Yohwa and the Puppeteer, whom you defeated last time, would have been far too much for me to handle."

"That’s strange."

I frowned.

"To Yohwa and Hayul, you probably looked like me. Wouldn’t that make them easier to control mentally?"

"They said there couldn’t be two Guild Leaders in this world, and tried to kill me while leaving the puppet alone."

"..."

"Now, then."

CLAP.

Go Yori clapped her hands.

And suddenly, we were in the Busan Station waiting hall.

Proof that control over this world of the unconscious had passed to Go Yori.

"You can leave whenever you like now. Before, I wasn’t strong enough to help you. Go to sleep here, and when you open your eyes, you’ll be in reality."

"..."

"Lie down here, Guild Leader."

PAT. PAT.

Go Yori sat on a bench and playfully patted her thighs. Apparently, she intended to pull the lap-pillow cliché again.

"Hmm."

That I could now return to reality.

That I had subdued, to some degree, this great void that could be called a “dream within a dream,” the “World After the Bad Ending,” or “Parallel Worlds.” These were good tidings.

But there were many inconsistencies in what Go Yori said.

If she had intended to cooperate willingly from the beginning, why had she eliminated tutorial Fairy No. 264?

Hadn’t she removed the dream demon as a variable in advance, to leave me no choice but to rely on her, and thus use me to clean up the Bad Endings?

More importantly.

"You. You’re not just an illusion."

"Pardon?"

"A week ago, when you introduced yourself, you claimed that you were merely my fears and aversion given form in my unconscious, as though you were a separate being from the real Go Yori."

Yes.

She had most certainly said this.

["If I had to put it into words, perhaps I’m a manifestation of your fears and aversion, Guild Leader?"]

["Of course, it’s terribly sad that your unconscious fears should have taken my form, of all things."]

But just now, Go Yori had confessed.

"Then how could you have nearly been killed trying to approach Yohwa and Hayul? Before I set foot here, my fear shouldn’t have taken concrete form, and you shouldn’t have existed."

"..."

“Hmm” and “Hmmm” slipped from Go Yori’s lips.

After a long while, those lips curved.

"How strange."

She wore a smile that seemed troubled.

"Guild Leader... Your ‘memory’ is remarkably, truly remarkably solid, isn’t it?"

"..."

"This isn’t just an ordinary good memory, is it? Ah. Well, yes. I think that explains quite a lot."

"You..."

"I am always here, Guild Leader. For thousands of years, and for thousands of years to come."

STEP.

Go Yori walked toward me.

"Since you helped me, I’ll help you, too. You’ve lived so very hard that far too much sediment has accumulated here."

"Sediment."

"Yes. Think about it. Normally, you would never have witnessed the ‘Logout Game’ and met your end there, would you?"

"..."

"But you did witness it in the end. Humanity’s nightmares should have ended with Tenlegs, at most. Yet the farther forward you walk, the more they keep multiplying. Countless forms of the end have piled up. Ah."

"Of course," Go Yori added.

"I’m not blaming you, Guild Leader. I’m merely pointing out that the nightmares you’ve witnessed keep piling up, again and again, in the depths of your unconscious, if nowhere else."

"..."

"When you gaze into the void, the void also gazes into you. That’s a saying you like, isn’t it, Guild Leader? Yes. You’ve been nurturing a void like this inside your heart."

STEP.

Go Yori drew closer.

"So, I think you should come down here from time to time and clean it regularly."

"Clean it."

"Yees. Like cleaning a house. When you return, I’ll come out to meet you like this sometimes, too."

"... Are you saying you’re my ally?"

"Of course, Guild Leader. I’m a member of your guild to begin with, aren’t I?"

"Then you should be able to grant me a favor."

I said,

"Yori. Please disappear from my dreams. That would be much better for my mental health."

"Ahaha."

Go Yori smoothly extended her hand. Her palm gently covered my eyes.

Darkness, warm with body heat.

"I’m sorry, but I can’t do that, Guild Leader."

Apple-scented breath whispered right before my nose.

"Because we are already one, aren’t we?"

Blackout.

10

There are epilogues.

First, the first epilogue.

Afterward, just as Go Yori had promised, I returned safely to reality.

But the tutorial fairies who should have been surrounding my bed were nowhere to be seen. For some reason, they were going about their work in the casino as though nothing had happened.

It was truly bewildering. I asked whether they hadn’t been in the middle of performing a ritual to send me into the world of the unconscious.

"Hweh?"

Fairy No. 264, whose head had definitely been blown off in the dream, tilted its perfectly intact head.

"What are you talking about, Comrade General Secretary? We can show humans the dreams they want, but we don’t have the ability to take you somewhere that terrifying."

"..."

"Dreams are places to enjoy, not ruins to explore! Not only have we never received such an order from you, Comrade General Secretary, but even if we had, it would be impossible to carry out!"

The fairy snickered, “Heeheehee.”

It must have been my imagination, but I thought I caught a scent of apples from somewhere.

11

The second epilogue.

Whatever the fairies might say, one thing was certain: I had more or less subdued the “dream within a dream,” the “Bad Ending,” and “Parallel Worlds.”

The effects of my victory began showing the very next day.

First, a stream of testimonies appeared on SG Net.

-Anonymous: Upvote if you’re feeling good this morning because you slept so fucking well lmao

└Anonymous: You too?? I’ve had nightmares every night since my last trip into the void, but today I seriously slept like a log, no lie.

└BookishGirl: ? Same here. Weird.

-[Yuldoguk]SwordEmpress: Healthy sleep is essential to arduous training. Today, too, I welcomed slumber with proper posture, that I might glimpse the lofty heights of martial prowess.

-[National Roads]Historian: Your waking habits carry over into your sleeping habits. If you suffer from insomnia, start by reviewing your daily routine and checking for things you can improve one at a time.

-Anonymous: Fuck, I don’t know about anything else, but if I could just sleep properly every day like I did today, I wouldn’t ask for anything more.

A similar phenomenon had probably occurred overseas, too.

As I always emphasize, mental well-being is tremendously important to humans, and sound sleep goes a long way toward ensuring it.

In that sense, couldn’t I, the Undertaker, congratulate myself on having succeeded in looking after all of humanity’s mental health, however slightly?

"Good morning, Commander."

"Good morning, my ass. It’s a fucking awful morning. Thanks to someone, I only got three hours of fitful sleep, and I feel like I’m losing my mind. But you look absolutely delighted. How lovely to see...?"

"Ah."

... Come to think of it, I had returned without defeating the Bad Ending of the person who needed healthy sleep most.

Next time, I would have to look for Noh Doha first in the world of the unconscious.

12

The third epilogue.

This final epilogue did not actually happen in reality. It was merely a scene that I, the Undertaker, saw in a dream.

But you know those dreams, don’t you?

Dreams so vivid that, looking back later, it is difficult to tell whether they were really dreams or waking life.

In that dream, I was dreaming Old Man Scho’s dream.

As is often the case with dreams, the viewpoint was unclear.

Sometimes I looked down on Old Man Scho from a third-person observer’s perspective.

Sometimes I briefly inhabited him myself, enjoying a first-person protagonist’s perspective.

And beside me, Emit Schopenhauer, was Adele.

["..."]

["..."]

We spent the entire day happily together.

Adele loved taking walks, and I loved walking alongside Adele while she did.

["I know a good walking trail."]

["Really? How?"]

["Well, come along and you’ll see."]

I revealed my hidden walking routes to Adele, who knew nothing of Korea’s geography.

Throughout my regressions, I had occasionally scouted out walking trails for moments like this. I showed my wife the paths that had caught my eye in Seoul, in Sejong, and in Busan.

Adele was as delighted as though she had received a surprise gift.

["I never knew you had such a knack for this!"]

Hearing that alone made all the time I had spent researching worthwhile.

Then, as the day drew to a close.

I was sitting on a bench with Adele when, suddenly, far away beyond the blue hydrangeas and arborvitae, I spotted a somehow familiar face.

My friend. The Undertaker stood with his back to a tree.

‘Ah.’

At that moment, I understood.

This landscape steeped in sunset was a dream.

‘Yes. I... I wanted to see my wife before I died.’

I wanted to grow old with you.

I wanted to live with you.

I wanted to die with you. I wanted to, but...

I couldn’t.

["Emit?"]

["..."]

I squeezed her hand.

In the little time I had left, I murmured to Adele.

["Listen. I had a hard day today."]

["Hm?"]

["Something really painful happened after we parted."]

She was startled.

She asked if it had, and whether I was all right.

I looked at my wife’s face as she asked. For as long as I could. As deeply as I could.

["Yes. But it’s all right."]

I’m glad I survived until now.

For the first time, that thought came to me.

I was glad I had struggled and struggled to survive. Perhaps it had been closer to running away than surviving. Even so, I was glad I had not vanished forever.

Because that was what had made this moment possible.

["Now that I’m with you, everything’s all right."]

I said,

["I love you."]

And there, my dream ended.

It should have been nothing more than a dream, yet I could only sit on my bed for a while.

Had that dream been merely an illusion created entirely inside my own head?

Or, with a passage now open into the world of the unconscious, had I briefly touched a scene Old Man Scho had truly dreamed at some point?

Or... perhaps that dream had been the final illusion Go Yori showed the Sword Demon as she held him?

["Which would you prefer, Guild Leader?"]

Suddenly, I heard Go Yori’s voice.

["Would you want him to have smiled in my arms?"]

["Or would you want him to have come to his senses at the very last moment, realizing that this was only false comfort after all?"]

I smiled bitterly.

Yes. Even if this was Old Man Scho’s fate after falling into an anomaly, I wanted his final moments, at least, to be peaceful.

If that dream truly was a scene Go Yori had shown him, then I would have to acknowledge this one thing willingly.

Of all the ends humanity could meet, the end met in Go Yori’s arms would be the most comforting in the world.

-The Doomsayer. End.