Chapter 139 - The Fortunate One I

1

As I explained in the previous episode, monopolizing lucky breaks is impossible in this world.

More precisely, you can do it if you want to, but there is no telling what sort of fallout will hit you later. Much like an unhealthy, carb-heavy dessert cake.

“Hmm.”

And I agonized over the matter exactly like someone on a strict diet faced with a delicious cake.

The Monkey’s Paw lay on the table.

'Just how far does something count as a lucky break, and where does it stop?'

For instance... Yes.

To establish a connection with Dang Seorin as quickly as possible, I toured Busan’s best restaurants—a carefully curated route consisting exclusively of her favorite dishes.

This was information I had gathered through firsthand legwork over successive runs. Did the Total Fortune System anomaly treat even this sort of regressor knowledge as “good fortune”?

'That would be rather unfair. By that logic, even my regression ability would have to count as good fortune.'

I chuckled.

After a little research, it seemed the Total Fortune System wasn’t quite that strict.

I had paid for my regressor knowledge with sweat, time, and sometimes even my life. It was an achievement earned through tireless effort, not a stroke of luck that had suddenly fallen from the sky.

Thus, even if I consumed an elixir like Tenlegs’ heart, there were no side effects. Oh Dokseo had worried for nothing.

'Hmm. Then just what level of luck qualifies as genuine good fortune?'

I couldn’t help growing curious.

'Shall I test it?'

As it happened, this was my 590th run. Since I generally enjoyed a “vacation run” every five or ten runs, the timing was perfect.

I regressed and finished my assorted early-run tasks—recruiting the Saintess, bringing Noh Doha on board, and so forth. Then, this time, I headed straight to Jeju Island.

Jeju Island’s tutorial dungeon had already ended as well. Naturally, since it had opened long before Busan Station’s.

I picked up the Monkey’s Paw near the summit of Seongsan Ilchulbong. Beside Kuro, who already lay sprawled there covered in hair, I made my wishes.

“Monkey’s Paw, Monkey’s Paw. Grant my wishes.”

—...

“First. Give me endless good fortune.”

The Monkey’s Paw twitched and trembled. Apparently, this was the right way to make a wish.

“What I mean is, let me enjoy even the good fortune I could normally never experience. The kind of luck one would consider practically impossible.”

—...!

“Second. Let the side effects of that good fortune begin coming for me exactly ten years from now.”

—...! ...!

“Third. Even after I’ve made all my wishes, postpone turning my body into a hairy mess until ten years from now. That’s a kind of misfortune too, isn’t it?”

—...

At that moment, strange laughter rang out from every direction.

OO-KEE-KEE-KEE! HEE! OO-KEE-KEE! HEEK!

A monkey’s laughter. No—a strangely mechanical sound, as though an AI were imitating a monkey’s laughter.

Along with that sound, the Monkey’s Paw suddenly crumbled into powder.

“Oh.”

Loosely translated, that probably meant something like, “Your wishes have been granted.”

All the powder was absorbed into my forearm, but at a glance, my body showed no changes whatsoever.

'So the good fortune starts now.'

What events awaited me?

I tried standing still for a while at the summit of Seongsan Ilchulbong. Nothing happened.

“Hmm.”

Had my wishes actually gone through?

Half doubtful, I returned to the mainland.

For a while, I devoted myself to getting the National Road Management Corps established and attending to my various commitments, yet nothing occurred that could really be called overwhelming “good fortune.”

Just as I began wondering whether the Total Fortune System was simply too low-tier to fulfill my wishes...

KNOCK, KNOCK.

Someone came to my office door. Since I hadn’t yet cleared Inunaki Tunnel in this run, I was temporarily staying at the National Road Management Corps headquarters.

“Who is it?”

“I heard the finest swordsman on the Korean Peninsula resides here, and came to seek him out.”

“Hmm?”

I had never heard the voice of the person knocking before.

That was rather remarkable. Again, this story took place in my 590th run. By then, without the slightest exaggeration, I had met everyone living in Busan at least once.

As Old Man Scho put it, there might be “someone with a [Teleport] ability somewhere in this world,” so I routinely made an active effort to befriend people I didn’t know.

And yet this was a completely new voice?

What’s more, he had come looking for the peninsula’s finest swordsman. That suggested quite an unusual character, and I still didn’t know someone like that?

“I don’t know what brings you here, but please come in.”

“Then pardon the intrusion.”

The door opened.

How should I describe him?

An extraordinarily beautiful boy stood there.

“Uh...”

Those who have listened to my stories thus far will know that I don’t casually judge other people’s looks.

If I use words like “beautiful” or “pretty,” it means the other person possesses a charm so compelling that I simply cannot bear not to lavish praise on their appearance.

Just as one can only call a mountain a mountain, one can only call beauty beautiful. I describe only such “irresistible” faces—miracles of a sort that nature has bestowed upon humanity.

Accordingly, the boy before me had a more radiant face, complete with its own built-in glow, than any man I had ever seen.

Gray hair. Not a color drained by age, but one brimming with vitality. Proof that this unfamiliar visitor was awakened.

His fashion was peculiar. A modernized hanbok? No, he was wearing ragged hemp clothes that belonged in the Joseon era.

An outfit like that ought to have imposed an appearance debuff of about -30, yet it did nothing to suppress his aura.

Once again, I was astonished.

I had reached my 590th run without ever seeing someone like this?

Even if I hadn’t seen him myself, a face like that should have been a regular topic on SG Net.

“Ah, I’m sorry. I was staring at your face. How rude of me.”

“It is of no consequence.”

And his voice—good grief, it was so clear and refreshing.

Only belatedly did I notice that the visitor spoke in an extremely strange manner. His voice was so exquisite that I hadn’t paid attention to what he was saying.

His hair color and features were entirely different, but if a “male version of Go Yori” existed, wouldn’t he be on this level?

'Strange. That way of speaking sounds awfully familiar. Where have I heard it before...?'

I couldn’t quite recall.

The beautiful gray-haired boy spoke with utmost courtesy.

“More importantly, are you indeed Master Undertaker, the Korean Peninsula’s finest swordsman, who cut through two of Tenlegs’ hearts simultaneously?”

“Pardon? Ah, yes. I had help from other awakened, but my alias is certainly Undertaker.”

“Hmm. Then I have come to the right place.”

The beautiful boy tapped his waist. Even the positioning of his fingers was elegant.

A sword hilt hung at the waist of his hemp clothes. It looked like a practice sword rather than a real blade.

“I too, though unworthy, walk the warrior’s path. Having heard of your renown, Master Undertaker, I dared risk the discourtesy of visiting you unannounced. Would you be so kind as to cross blades with me?”

“... Uh.”

Huh.

Wait a minute.

'That grandiose “I”? A warrior? An aluminum practice sword?'

A terrifying sense of foreboding assailed my mind.

A peculiar feeling suddenly came over me, as though a swamp had opened up right before me, and I couldn’t use lightness techniques to cross it—I would have to wade in wearing sandals.

But I, the Undertaker, was known as a genius at managing my mental state. Forcing down that foreboding, I spoke calmly.

“... Hmm. I’d be happy to practice martial arts with you, but may I ask your name?”

“Good heavens. Would you look at that. I forgot to introduce myself. Courtesy ought to become ingrained with age, yet I only keep forgetting it. I fear I am still far from worthy of calling myself a seeker of the Way. Hohoho.”

With a crisp motion, the boy—who looked as though he might barely have reached eighteen—blamed his age and performed a fist-and-palm salute. It was an impeccably precise salute of the kind you might see in an old Hong Kong film.

“I am called the Sword Marquis. I am a noble of a fallen nation far away, the Principality of Sealand, and the sect leader of the Mount Hua Sect.”

“...”

“By good fortune, I recently attained a great enlightenment and returned from old age to youth. Yet a warrior’s duty is not to be content with this realm, but to devote himself ever more fervently to training! Thus I seek out the mighty of Korea. Undertaker, I ask that you too grant me a lesson!”

“...”

This was driving me insane.

2

The Sword Marquis... That is, the beautiful boy who claimed to be the Sword Marquis, a deranged martial-arts fanatic, was, for starters, extremely powerful.

“Wahahaha! Truly, the world is vast, and the martial world abounds with masters! To think that even this remote land of Korea should harbor a swordsman who has attained such unfathomable heights. You have taught me well!”

“Ah, yes...”

I won the duel. But of course, for a regressor on his 590th run, victory was merely a standard feature that ought to come as a given.

The issue was the process of achieving it.

The Sword Marquis exchanged no fewer than 101 moves with me. Apart from myself and the Sword Demon that appeared in the great void of Dream Within a Dream, he was practically at a level where he could justifiably proclaim himself the strongest under heaven.

The gray-haired lunatic before me possessed enough ability to be entrusted with an entire front against the anomalies.

An exceptionally powerful asset had joined our side.

I ought to have been happy.

I ought to have been.

“You... have some moves yourself, sir...”

“Come now! However advanced my years, how could I accept praise from a junior who surpasses me in attainment? Do not embarrass this old man.”

“Yeees...”

“Hmm! I shall remain here in Dongnae for the time being. I am now convinced that my current attainment is insufficient to restore the glory of the Mount Hua Sect. Undertaker, I intend to devote myself solely to training until I can at least cross swords with you on equal terms.”

“...”

What was this?

Why was it so irritating?

Had this crazed martial-arts fanatic really looked like this back in his prime? Had he actually been this good with a sword?

You seriously expected me to believe this, anomaly?

“Ah!”

“...?”

That was it. This was all an illusion created by Go Yori!

Gah. To think she had unleashed Mirror Flower, Water Moon without even me noticing! Go Yori, what a terrifying girl...!

I tried torturing my cheeks by every means available. For some reason, I didn’t wake from the dream.

Damn it.

“What has gotten into you? It is not good for a young man to acquire the habit of abusing his own body.”

I was thousands of times older than him.

No, that wasn’t the important part.

“Excuse me, sir. You said you underwent... a complete bodily transformation, correct?”

“Hmm. Indeed.”

“As you know, the world is a very dangerous place these days, and that transformation might have been some anomaly’s trick. May I ask exactly how you came upon this lucky break...?”

“Ah. Of course. The mysteries of enlightenment ought to be shared among like-minded friends!”

The Sword Marquis stroked his chin, as though a long beard grew there despite its complete absence.

In short, when bullshit reached that level, one could say it verged on performance art.

“It happened while I sat cross-legged on a beach in Yuldoguk, absorbed in a meditation question.”

Right. You were fishing on a beach in Ulleungdo. I know.

“Yet, though night had not yet fallen, the color of the sky upon the distant horizon changed into the Milky Way.”

“...?”

“Indeed. I sensed at once that the moment of enlightenment had come. Upon reflection, the boundary between day and night is merely a temporary distinction made by man. Within the ceaseless flow of time, it is nothing more than the principle of an endless circle, briefly brightening and briefly darkening in turn. So it is with all things in this world. That I should find it strange for night to unfold in the day, or day in the night, proved that I remained bound by prejudice. A warrior, then, is a being who must choose between two paths: to press forward with that stubborn conviction using a single sword, or to hasten a little the day when the principle shall unfold in its entirety. As for me, day remains distinct as day and retains its own beauty, while night remains night and alone illuminates the Milky Way. Even if it lasts but an instant, beholding that fleeting moment is the privilege of the individual that I am. Aha! Then my desire to prolong this privilege is not mere selfishness for my own sake, but devotion to all living things that live for an instant and die for an instant!”

I apologize for transcribing that entire lengthy formula for you, but the Sword Marquis really said all of it, so I have no choice.

I wanted to interrupt him, but it was difficult to do so. Though I sometimes forgot, the Korean Peninsula’s total food production depended on the old man before me—who was no longer old.

In other words, I couldn’t risk offending him by casually cutting him off.

“So... Hmm, after you attained that enlightenment...?”

“When I awoke, I had returned to my youth. Hohoho.”

What the hell was that?

That was just a lucky break you could sum up with the words “got lucky”—ah.

Ah!

'Got lucky!'

Only then did I recall making my wishes to the Monkey’s Paw on Jeju Island a year earlier.

That was it.

The Sword Marquis had “luckily,” “by chance,” attained enlightenment on a beach and undergone a complete bodily transformation.

Good fortune in its purest form. A lucky break that had never occurred even once across all 590 runs!

I stole a glance at the Sword Marquis. The young old man—or old young man—was chuckling.

And, as will soon become clear, the Sword Marquis’s return to youth was merely the starting point of the “good fortune” I would experience in my 590th run.